Celebmonkey

Sienna Miller's Home Vandalized!

Sienna Miller's house in London has been vandalized by someone who evidently doesn't like her recent relationship choices.

The spray-painted word "SLUT" appears on an exterior wall, accompanied by what The Sun is calling "an unsettling circular symbol - which looks like an attempt to recreate the sign for Satan."  I call it a poorly-sliced pizza.  Or perhaps it's a clumsily-drawn hobo symbol - it does look a bit like the one for "good place for a handout."  Which suits, no?  Click here to see if you can find it!

The Sun further states:

The...graffiti materialised despite the apparent presence of security lights and a burglar alarm system on the outside of the building.

Since when can a burglar alarm detect spray paint?  And I know this is awful, but it isn't like Sienna hasn't done plenty to deserve being called names.  What other word is there for a woman who gallivants around topless with another man's wife?

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Newlywed Chris Kattan Is Separated Already

Chris Kattan and his bride Sunshine Tutt just got married less than two months ago, but there already seems to be trouble in paradise.  Life & Style Weekly says that the newlyweds have already separated.

Kattan's rep revealed:

“They’re separated for the moment but are working on it.”

And "an insider close to the couple shared: 

“They’ve got issues that they’re trying to work out...It’s not a divorce right now, but they're taking time apart.”

I'm pretty sure though that they had "issues to work out" before the wedding... unless one of them cheated on the other, what issues suddenly develop after two months of marriage?  Kattan and Tutt had been together since 2005, and were married this past June 28th in Yosemite.  Whatever the bump in the road, we wish them luck getting past it.

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Ryan Gosling & Rachel McAdams: Back On

Though they broke up over a year ago, it looks like Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling are getting close again.    People reports:

The Canadian-born pair went to dinner Monday with a couple of friends in Toronto at Grace restaurant [and] reportedly held hands during the meal.

Ryan hung out with Kirsten Dunst a lot this past spring, but evidently that didn't last very long.  The old fires may have been re-stoked last month when Rachel turned up to see Ryan DJ at the Green Door in Hollywood.   Will the second time be a charm for these two?  Time will tell!

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Just How Old Is Jessica Simpson Again?

Like, 12?  Maybe that's giving her too much credit.   Jessica Simpson apparently loves Tony Romo so much that she uses the Dallas Cowboy's theme song as her cell phone ring tone. 

An innocent bystander in a Chicago bar told OK! Magazine:

“Jess’s girlfriend was teasing her because it kept ringing with her boyfriend’s team’s tune.”

And I would too.   

I wonder if she changed her ring tone after Tony revealed that she is in his top three iPod picks?    Or maybe she's trying to legitimize herself and her country music "career"?  Or perhaps she's trying to make me throw up? 

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Heidi and Spencer's Evil Plan To Subject The World To Their Nuptials

Heidi Montag revealed today that she and Spencer Pratt plan to marry on live television.

"I'm just waiting for that big ring!" she said.

I beg you, Spencer, please don't ever buy her a ring.  Pretty please?  'Cause I don't know which is worse... the idea that I might unintentionally see this wedding on TV, thereby blinding myself forever - or the idea that these two dorks' egos are so big that they think anyone will care enough to tune in.

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Donnie Wahlberg and Kim Fey: Fini!

Donnie Wahlberg and his wife Kim Fey filed divorce petitions last week in Los Angeles and Ventura Counties, citing irreconcilable differences.

The couple married in 1999 and have been separated for several months.  They have two sons, Xavier (15) and Elijah (7).  Fey is asking for sole custody of the boys with visitation to Walhberg, spousal support, and attorneys' fees.   

I guess Donnie just doesn't have "the right stuff"...

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Ellen and Portia's Wedding: Pictures!

A bit late, but here they are... gorgeous (if grainy) photos from Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi's wedding this past Saturday.

Ellen looked dapper-soft butch in white, while Portia was incredibly dreamy in a Zac Posen halter dress with a pink skirt. 

Could these two be any happier?  So cute!

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Weekly Monkey Chow: Romance Roundup

Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott are scary! (TENGossip)

I am still shaking my head at Peaches Geldof's marriage. (Gravy & Biscuits)

Kate Moss got weak in the knees when she kissed Frank Sinatra. (Bumpshack)

Hugh Hefner's new girlfriend is a brunette - NSFW! (Extrawhoredinary)

Shaquille O'Neal and his wife are not getting divorced after all. (Ace Showbiz)

Selena Gomez is supporting her boyfriend's new album just a little too enthusiastically. (Guanabee)

Chris Brown and Rihanna's duet has been leaked... but they still won't say they're dating. (LadyThrills)

Rachel Hunter is getting married. (Behind Blondie Park)

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Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi: Wed!

Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi were married on Saturday at their home in Los Angeles. 

Their rep confirmed that the couple "exchanged handwritten vows in an intimate ceremony attended by 19 guests." 

I can't possibly extend enough congratulations to these two!  Ellen is such a positive icon, and she and Portia make the cutest couple.  Can't wait for the details...  you know we'll have them here when they're available...

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Julie Berman of General Hospital Wed Friday

Julie Berman, better known as Lulu on General Hospital, married her beau Michael Grady on Friday in Los Angeles.   

(Who is this Lulu character?  If, like me, you haven't watched daytime soaps forever, you might be surprised to know that Lulu is the daughter of Luke and Laura Spencer.  And if, like me, you remember Luke and Laura's wedding, you're probably, like me, feeling rather old right now.)

The Catholic ceremony was held at the Sacred Heart Chapel at Loyola Marymount University (where my best friend happens to work!), and several of her GH costars attended.   The happy bride said of the commercial real estate broker she married: 

"Mike is my best friend, and ultimately he is my soul mate...He's the guy I want to do everything with – the guy I want to be with when he's old and wrinkly."

Awwww, cute!  Here's hoping she always feels that way!  Congratulations to them!

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