Anna Kournikova Sucks at Tennis, Still Crazy Hot

We agree, wholeheartedly, with The Evil Beet and their assessment of Anna Kournikova.  She was on hand at the opening of the K-Swiss Store in Santa Monica, CA.  It's great that she's the new spokesperson for K-Swiss.  With her "stunning" tennis career on hiatus, she needed something to do.  We imagine the conversation between our hot little heroine and the K-Swiss rep might have sounded something like this:

K-Rep: Anna, Dahling, We need you at store opening in Santa Monica to show off our new Plas-Ticks 2000.

Anna (in adorable Russian accent): Um, ok.  You want me in tennis attire for photo shoot?

K-Rep: Tennis?  Dahling, whatever for?

Anna: I was...am professional tennis pla...

K-Rep: OH MY GOD, You are so adorable!  No, no, you just shake that cute little ass over to the opening and we'll set up you up, my dear; something in a moon landing, circa 1971 mini, I think.

Anna: Oh..Well, ok.

K-Rep: Wonderful, Dahling.  Tennis...those looks and humor too. Priceless.

It's ok, Anna. You probably learned a long time ago what us ugly people have known all along.  "Hotness" don't give a damn.  You may be the worst bassoon player in the orchestra.  You may be the best chess player in Bangkok.  You might even have the worst singing voice in pop music.  Perhaps you're just ranked 2012th out of 2029 tennis players around the world.  It doesn't matter... 'cause you're hot.  And, again, "Hotness" don't give a damn.

So live it up, baby, you're young.  Those looks aren't gonna last forever, and you're sure as hell not getting any better at tennis.

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