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May 21, 2008

Angelina Jolie & Brad Pitt Fight Over Baby Names

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Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt look like a happy family in Cannes, but reports say that that might just be a front!  Rumors abound that the couple are arguing over what to name the twin buns Angelina is cooking in the oven. 

Evidently Angie wants to name the babies Castor and Pollux.  For those who haven't kept up on their ancient mythology, these are the twins for whom the astrological sign Gemini is named.  She's a Gemini, so that probably makes some kind of logical sense someway, no? 

Brad isn't happy with this choice, though.  He has "
put his fatherly foot down because he doesn’t want his little girl with a name that sounds like a British cuss word."  For those who haven't kept up on their British slang (that would be me), the word they're referring to is "bollocks," which means balls (thanks Wikipedia!).   

Now this is the point where celebrity rumors start to get just plain silly in my opinion.  How about leaving it at, Brad Pitt doesn't want his girl babies given boy names, which could very well be true?  But no, someone had to take it a couple of steps further into the realm of the ridiculous.    Either way, these kids are going to end up with some strange names, so maybe in the end Castor and Pollux aren't so bad after all?

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March 30, 2008

No Angelina & Brad Wedding, Says Source

Angelina Jolie,Brad Pitt

Us Magazine reports that a source calls the Brangelina New Orleans wedding rumors "complete and total bulls--t."

The source went on to say that the couple wasn't even in New Orleans this weekend.    Their reps apparently had no comment on the topic.

I guess only Angelina and Brad know the truth...

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Angie & Brad: Did They.... Or Didn't They??

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Depending on which celebrity rag's website you read, you've heard by now that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt either got married, or they didn't.

Several hours ago, Star Magazine reported that Brangelina got married Saturday in "an intimate wedding ceremony in the couple's adopted city of New Orleans."   The location supposedly was the French Quarter Wedding Chapel. 

On the other hand, People says that "a source" (dontcha love those sources?) tells them that "there was 'no wedding.'"

If this is true, it's the second wedding for Brad, who was married to Jennifer Aniston for five years.  Brad is Angelina's third husband, following Billy Bob Thornton and Jonny Lee Miller.

I'm frankly surprised.  I thought they'd be one of those couples who never ties the knot officially.

But who knows what really happened?  I'm sure the truth will come out in the next few days, especially since Star is promising details on the wedding in next week's issue.


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March 27, 2008

HOW Much Are Brad & Angelina's Twins Worth???

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The celebrity blogosphere is buzzing with speculation about how much money Brangelina will be offered for first photo rights of their impending twins. 

How much higher could you really go than the ridiculous sum of $6M People paid for pictures of Max & Emme Anthony?

Well.

How about $8-10 MILLION SMACKEROOS?

Of course you know Angie is going to give it all to charity, like she did when People paid HER $4.1M for first pictures of Shiloh.  But still. 

EIGHT TO TEN MILLION DOLLARS.

One word: 

Outrageous.


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March 25, 2008

Two Celebrities Related to Two Presidential Candidates - Unbelievable

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It will probably come as a shock to the known world, but according to the New England Historic Genealogical Society, Brad Pitt is distantly related to Barack Obama!  Not only that, but Angelina Jolie is related to Hillary Clinton.  Amazing!  Personally, I find it hard to believe that two human beings who know each other are ninth cousins to two other human beings who know each other.  With only 6 billion people on this planet, what are the odds that 4 of them are somehow related? 

To be fair, Clinton is also related to Madonna, Alanis Morisette, and Celine Dion while Obama is related to George W. Bush.  Perhaps some sort of celebrity/presidential conspiracy is afoot.

This shocking development is almost as significant as my twelfth cousin and I, Kim Jong Il, showing up at the same picnic to honor our common ancestor, Lothar of the Hill People - scourge of Asia during the 12th century.  With all due respect to megalomaniacal psychopaths everywhere, I'm not especially astounded that I could be related to an (in)famous person.  The truth is, the odds are heavily in favor of it.  I suppose this does add more flavor to the Obama/Clinton throw-down, for some people.  For instance, maybe Jennifer Aniston is an Obama fan.

All joking aside, this isn't exactly news.  But, in this country, what is news anymore anyway?  Personally, I can't wait to find out if the New England Historic Genealogical Society can somehow date Dick Cheney back to his original Haliburton production date in the 1890's or finally confirm the rampant rumors that our vice president is actually human after all.

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March 19, 2008

Boy and Girl Twins For Brangelina, Name Already Picked Out?

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Did J-Lo and Angelina drink the same water?  In Touch Weekly reports that Angelina Jolie is pregnant with boy/girl twins.

“They’ll be having a boy and a girl,” a pal tells In Touch. “Because she took fertility treatments to help her ovulate, her babies are fraternal. They’re ecstatic. She can’t wait.”

Rumor has it that their son Maddox gets to name one of the babies.  He's already picked Mallory for his little sister to be.   The name comes from his current favorite movie, "The Spiderwick Chronicles."

I'm actually glad that they're having twins, because now maybe WASP-y looking Shiloh won't be such an "outcast" in the most engineered rainbow family ever.

The question of "Where In The World Will Angelina Drop Her Babies?" still remains a mystery.  Maybe Pax or Zahara will help her decide.

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March 10, 2008

Angelina Jolie To Give Birth On Texas Ranch?

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Remember all that fuss in 2006 over her decision to have her baby (whom we now know as Shiloh) in Africa?   I figured she was just trying to make her baby as "ethnic" as she could given the genetic pool she had to work with.  She claimed, at the time, that she loves Africa because it is the "cradle of humankind."  Apparently it's also where she and Brad were first seen vacationing publicly and where she first took custody of her son Maddox (which makes no sense to me since Maddox is from Cambodia?). 

Well, Angelina's growing her brood again and of course that means making a decision on where to give birth.  (Let me say at this juncture that most people I know don't have the freedom to make these kinds of choices.  They have their baby at the hospital covered by their health insurance, if they're lucky to have any.)  Last month there were claims that she wanted to have her second biological child in France because of her French heritage.  Nothing third-world about France, but it's a lot more interesting than going to Cedars-Sinai.  ALL the A-listers have their babies there, geeeez!   

Now Ecorazzi reports that she might  give birth in Texas. 

Texas?   How hilarious!  I'd laugh at her for making such a pedestrian choice, but I'm not sure she's choosing anything:  Brad's filming there, and the family has all decamped to a 270-acre ranch in Smithville.

Smithville has a population of around 4,300, which has probably grown by several dozen (paparazzi) since the Jolie-Pitts moved to town.  There are apparently four family doctors serving the whole town, so I hope Angie imported her own OBGYN along with her kids. 

And if she decides she just can't deal with the whitebreadness of it all, she can always just nip over the border to Mexico and have her baby there.  She doesn't have a Latino baby yet, so maybe a baby born in a Spanish speaking country would help round out her collection.  Or maybe while she's there she can just pick one up to take back with her.  I'm so surprised she hasn't done it yet, but then again she's been pretty busy collecting African and Asian babies.  She'll get around to it eventually, I'm sure.

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