Heidi Montag revealed today that she and Spencer Pratt plan to marry on live television.
"I'm just waiting for that big ring!" she said.
I beg you, Spencer, please don't ever buy her a ring. Pretty please? 'Cause I don't know which is worse... the idea that I might unintentionally see this wedding on TV, thereby blinding myself forever - or the idea that these two dorks' egos are so big that they think anyone will care enough to tune in.
Here's a picture of Heidi Montag at last night's launch of Heidiwood - her new clothing line for Anchor Blue. Those flowers? Are from Spencer, who came out on stage and presented them to her with a kiss. I guess this week they're on again.
Heidi comments on the frequent use of a signature element of her line:
“I love zebra print!” she said. “I’m obsessed with it!”
This didn't need explaining - zebra is all over Heidiwood. She's wearing items from the line in this pic, and you can see more here. Some of this stuff is cute, especially the accessories. I like the blue tanktop and the beaded bangle bracelet. But it's nothing too exciting - largely like anything you could find at Target or Mervyns. This is not groundbreaking fashion, folks.
Heidiwood's tag line is "Welcome To La La Land," which is apt considering that Heidi looks like she's IN La La Land the vast majority of the time. The thing about her I don't get, though, is whether she's seriously that airheaded or whether her whole persona is a huge fabrication. What's your take? Tell us what you think!
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Dateline WTF-ville:
The New York Times recently called Heidi Montag a 'feminist hero' in a review of the MTV reality show, 'The Hills.' Um....yeah. We're not sure if it was the Stuff men's magazine pictorial, the boob and/or nose job, or the "very sexual" music she claims to perform, but something about Heidi got the Times thinking Nora Ephron and Margaret Mead. Ah yes, magnanimous activism in the form of rampant, scantily-clad self promotion and yet another fashion line - 'Heidiwood'; just what the world's been longing for.
Look, calling Heidi a 'feminist hero' is like calling me a vegetarian because I occasionally have broccoli or carrots with dinner. According to In Touch she is "very honored to be called a feminist hero." She considers herself a feminist and she's happy to accept the 'hero' title, but when asked about her feminist role models she had little to say:
"Um...I'll get back to you on that one."
Right. Ok, Heidi, just nod your pretty little head and act like you know what everyone is talking about. I'm sure if the New York Times had called her a great 'chiropodist' she'd just talk about how amazing it is to be considered alongside all those other renowned chiropodists such as.......
That's right, kids; chiropodist. Look it up.
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Despite lukewarm to outright hostile reviews of her single/video "Higher," Heidi Montag has boldly released another song, entitled "No More."
That's what the world said when Heidi released her first song, of course, but did she listen? No. She was too busy staging a photoshoot crying.
Take a listen here, dear readers - if you dare. Don't say we didn't warn you.
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Oh no they didn't! Heidi Montag and Britney Spears sing a duet? Unfortunately, yes, and if you don't think you'll miss your hearing at all, you can listen to it here.
This combination might seem illogical, but when you think about it, it starts to make sense. Two blonde attention whores who would do just about anything for media exposure and/or money? The only difference is that I think Britney still has some talent buried beneath all her mental health issues, and Heidi... well. You've seen her latest video, right?
